


Momoshiro's Lonely Hearts App

by looker



Category: Tennis no Oujisama | Prince of Tennis
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Future, Dialogue Heavy, M/M, aka ryouma never comes to japan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-19
Updated: 2016-07-19
Packaged: 2018-07-25 11:23:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,071
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7530859
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/looker/pseuds/looker
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Online dating apps are full of weirdos and liars, but Momoshiro's never met a person more brazen than someone posing as an international sports celebrity and honestly, genuinely expecting him to believe him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Momoshiro's Lonely Hearts App

**Author's Note:**

> this was inspired by a bunch of other texting/chat fic but especially by lahdolphin's niouh/marui fic, which is really fun  
> also inspired by a stupid au prompt on tumblr  
> anyway this was really self-indulgent and fun to write while i was procrastinating

[13:41] Wow.

[13:41] You have got to be the worst catfish I’ve ever seen.

\---

**[02:01] ?**

[02:25] Like, if you’re going to steal a famous person’s picture, at least don’t use one that was in every news outlet two weeks ago.

**[02:25] idk what you mean**

**[02:25] -_- that me**

[02:26] That’s Ryouma Echizen winning Wimbledon.

**[02:26] yeah**

**[02:26] your point**

**[02:34] ?**

[02:34] You’re not Ryouma Echizen and you've never won Wimbledon.

**[02:34] i am and i have but ok**

[02:34] That picture has a WATERMARK on it.

[02:34] Honestly it’s kind of insulting you expect me to believe you.

[02:35] I mean, I’m not a smart guy, but come on.

[02:35] You could take a face pic right now if you wanted me to believe you.

**[02:35] what even gave u the impression that i care if you believe me**

[02:48] Whatever.

\---

[12:09] Okay. Giving you the benefit of the doubt that you ARE Echizen, I have two questions.

[12:09] 1) why would you need to use this shitty dating app, 2) why would you use a picture from a press release instead of, like, an actual picture of your face.

**[02:59] 1 didnt make it someone signed me up 2 i take crappy pics**

[03:02] Follow up question: why the hell do you reply at ass o’ clock in the morning.

[03:02] Don’t you have a strict training schedule, Mr Big Time Tennis Player???

[03:04] Also Ryouma Echizen is like, one of the most photogenic people to ever exist.

[03:04] So that excuse doesn’t even make sense.

[03:12] Wait now I’m looking at the rest of your uploads and why the hell do you have like 50 pics of some kind of animal with mange?

**[03:12] im blocking you**

**[03:12] karupin is old leave them alone**

**[03:12] its not their fault**

[03:13] It has a name?

**[03:14] dont ever talk 2 me again**

[03:14] What the fuck

_[03:14] This user has ignored you and will not receive your messages._

\---

**[20:29] hey**

[20:32] Wow. You can actually text at a human time?

**[20:35] yeah i forgot this was a japanese app sry**

**[20:35] im in the us right now**

**[20:35] timezones**

[20:34] Yeah, right.

[20:35] Why did you unblock me?

**[20:38] just wanted 2 apologize**

**[20:39] for messaging so late**

**[20:39] i forget people have actual jobs**

[20:42] Yeah, okay.

**[20:42] what do you do**

[20:45] I’m a salaryman.

**[20:45] LMFAO yeah right**

[20:47] ??? lmfao??

**[20:49] wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww**

[20:50] What’s funny about that?

**[20:52] just funny that you accuse me of lying about my pic**

**[20:52] when u say thats ur pic but ur a salaryman**

**[20:52] howd you get those abs working in an office**

**[20:53] do you do crunches at ur desk**

[20:56] I have a life outside of work, you know.

[20:59] …that, and that picture MAY be a few years old.

**[21:02] knew it lol**

\---

[15:12] To be clear, I may not be AS shredded now, but I’m still good looking.

**[15:15] wtf its 2am**

**[15:15] and you message me just to tell me that**

[15:19] Not nice being woken up in the middle of the night to some stranger’s bullshit, is it?

**[15:21] whatever can i go back to sleep**

[15:23] Hold on.

[15:23] _Recipient received photo message._

[15:23] SEE

**[15:25] wow lol**

**[15:25] nice (singular) ab**

[15:25] Leave me alone. The lighting in here is shit.

**[15:26] im kidding www**

**[15:27] nice pic tho**

**[15:27] nice boobies**

[15:29] What the hell.

**[15:31] i mean pecs**

**[15:31] sry my japanese is rusty**

**[15:32] had to google how 2 compliment your chest**

**[15:32] are you at the gym**

[15:33] Getting the train home right now. I had the day off today, so…

[15:33] I try to go after work most days, though. Usually that doesn’t work out.

**[15:33] how come**

[15:34] Work runs late a lot. And coworkers like going out for drinks.

**[15:35] and you dont**

**[15:35] ?**

[15:36] I just started at this company, so it’s not like I really know anyone.

[15:36] My only real drinking buddy moved across country a few months ago though, so I’ve gotta get out with somebody.

**[15:40] you drink often**

**[15:40] ?**

[15:40] You don’t?

**[15:43] is that weird**

[15:45] I mean, I guess not. But you’re only a year younger than me. Most kids your age like going out.

**[15:50] im not a kid**

**[15:50] and most alcohol tastes awful**

**[15:50] and i dont have much free time**

**[15:51] or friends**

**[15:51] lol**

**[15:52] my bro tries 2 drag me out but he’s annoying so i dont go**

**[15:52] hes the one who signed me up to this last time we visited the old mans fam**

**[15:53] he thinks i need to be more sociable or something**

[15:54] Did it work?

**[15:55] not really**

**[15:55] ur like the only person who talks to me**

**[15:55] and i don’t message other ppl**

[15:57] Wow, I’m honoured.

**[15:57] you shouldnt be**

**[15:57] im just bored**

**[15:58] and now im tired**

**[15:58] so im going to sleep**

[16:00] I’m going to add you as a friend.

[16:00] It’s sad seeing Friends (0) on your profile.

[16:01] Even if you are an impostor.

\---

[05:02] _tennis69_ _has accepted your friend request._

_\---_

[06:10] _tennis69_ _uploaded a new picture._

_\---_

[22:02] I can’t believe I was almost excited when you uploaded a new picture.

[22:04] Don’t block me, but what is that? Is it a cat?

**[22:05] its karupin**

**[22:05] dont be mean they have a medical condition.**

**[22:06] their skin is bad and their fur falls out. they used to be really fluffy.**

**[22:06] still happy tho. just bald.**

[22:08] Okay. Why is it standing in your shoes?

**[22:08] theyre wearing them**

[22:09] You have a very loose definition of “wearing”.

**[22:10] use ur imagination**

**[22:10]** **its cute**

[22:13] I guess I’m just more of a dog person.

**[22:13] ugh**

**[22:13] figures**

[22:14] Is that a dealbreaker for you?

**[22:14] nah not a dealbreaker but it’s a turnoff**

**[22:14] do you not wanna sleep w/ me now**

[22:14] I don’t remember ever saying I wanted to sleep with you.

**[22:15] quote “ryouma echizen is one of the hottest people to ever exist” end quote**

[22:16] I said he was PHOTOGENIC.

[22:16] Which is completely unrelated to you, because you’re not Ryouma Echizen.

**[22:18] idk why you dont believe me**

[22:19] Sorry for thinking that the number 1 tennis player in the world who literally JUST won Wimbledon for the fourth time in a row with a win-loss record of 66-0 this year has to resort to a shitty free app just to find dates.

**[22:20] wow thats creepy**

**[22:20] why do u know how many games ive played this year**

**[22:21] i dont even know that**

[22:22] You understand the concept of googling to find out how to compliment a guy on his body but not to find out a tennis players stats?

**[22:22] maybe we have different priorities**

[22:23] Maybe you should put more research into your fake internet persona.

**[22:25] ok**

**[22:25] its kind of lame you keep accusing me of being fake**

**[22:26] when you don’t even show ur face in ur profile pic**

**[22:26] and all ive seen is from the neck down**

**[22:29] and i don’t even know your name**

[22:32] Call me Momo-chan.

**[22:32] id rather not**

[22:32] Don’t be like that.

[22:33] Anyway, it’s not like I’m lying about who I am.

[22:34] I am a salaryman. And I work in Tokyo.

[22:34] But I want to be discrete online. Y’know?

**[22:35] ohhhhhhhhhhhh**

**[22:35] ur not out yet**

**[22:36] that’s fine u could have just said**

[22:38] Don’t just assume things.

[22:40] But yeah, it’s not like anybody at work knows. And if they had to, there’d be better ways for them to find out.

[22:42] Anyway, not like anyone would ever believe you were really Echizen, but wouldn’t you worry about the press finding this profile if you actually were him?

**[22:43] ?**

[22:44] It says right there. “Interested in: men”.

**[22:44] i dont really care**

**[22:45] if they really wanted to know that they could just ask me**

**[22:45] but they just ask if im dating women so obviously im going to say no**

**[22:46] when we visited japan this year we went to see my dads old coach**

**[22:48] and someone took pics of me w/ her granddaughter**

**[22:49] and some shitty tabloid ran a story saying she was my secret japanese fiancee**

**[22:52] i dont care but she was upset so i had this lawyer i know write them an angry letter**

**[22:52] its not like id actually sue them or whatever but it made them publish an apology**

**[22:54] it was really annoying at the time but its kind of funny now**

**[22:58] ppl just make up rumours because i don’t give them the answers they want**

**[22:58] but i dont think it would be a scandal if i came out**

[23:01] I remember that.

[23:03] She was cute.

**[23:04] sry she’s not single**

[23:04] I didn’t ask.

**[23:05] thought u might be wondering though**

**[23:06] u seem kind of desperate**

[23:06] What the hell kid

**[23:09] just saying lol**

**[23:10] you have like 500 friends and your profile was made a month ago**

[23:11] I’m just a friendly guy!

[23:12] It’s not my fault people like me. You’re just jealous.

**[23:14] sure**

**[23:15] gtg practice**

**[23:15] ill send you an abs pic after**

**[22:16] so were even**

[23:16] Block me.

\---

[06:12] _tennis69 is sending you a photo. ACCEPT / DECLINE_

[06:30] What the hell

[06:34] Whose abs are those?????

**[06:34] mine**

[06:35] No way would a guy with a body like that have to resort to stealing stock images of Echizen for his profile picture.

**[06:35] thanks?**

[06:37] Seriously, where did you get that picture?

[06:38] Reverse image searching it brings up NOTHING.

[06:39] Did some other guy send you it? Is another person being implicated in your catfish adventures?

[06:41] Am I getting second-hand nudes?

**[06:42] im wearing shorts**

[06:45] What’s next?

[06:45] Recycled dick pics???

[06:45] Don’t send me sloppy seconds.

[06:46] You better not be using MY picture to steal some poor guy’s heart.

**[06:47] cant guarantee it**

**[06:48] if i met a guy with a beer gut fetish itd be perfect**

[06:52] LEAVE ME ALONE

 

\---

 

[12:23] Okay, so the hat was a nice touch.

**[12:30] wat**

[12:31] I mean, Echizen has one just like it, so assuming that is your picture, having it in there was a cute addition.

[12:32] Even if it was just to provide an opportunity to hide your face.

[12:32] Impostor.

**[12:34] i cant believe this**

**[12:34] i send you a nice classy seminude and you spend hours agonizing over some deeper meaning behind it that doesnt exist**

[12:35] Don’t get me wrong, it was NICE.

[12:35] I just think maybe it’d be nicer if your face or any other identifying feature happened to be showing.

[12:36] Maybe I’m just a romantic like that.

[12:37] But if I were to give you the benefit of the doubt and assume that is you, I have two theories.

**[12:37] oh yeah**

[12:37] Yeah.

[12:37] Either you’re facially disfigured in some way, or you’re really fucking ugly.

[12:38] If it’s the former, then I literally don’t care about that.

[12:38] If it’s the latter, then my condolences, but I still don’t care.

**[12:39] its neither dumbass**

[12:40] THEN WHY DON’T YOU SHOW YOUR FACE

[12:41] Seriously I really really really really really don’t care.

[12:41] My old drinking buddy had the craziest eyes I’ve ever seen on a person and basically zero upper lip and I still thought HE was cute.

**[12:42] why dont you go message him then**

[12:43] He’d probably want to talk to me even less than you do.

**[12:43] that seems impossible**

[12:44] Shut up.

[12:56] Seriously though, no matter how ugly you are, at least you probably don’t hiss at people.

**[12:56] what does that have to do with anything**

[12:59] Never mind.

[13:00] My lunch break’s over and it’s too weird to explain anyway.

\---

[10:23] So like. Do you actually play tennis, or.

[10:24] How do you get that body.

**[10:25] i play tennis**

[10:26] Singles?

**[10:26] howd u know**

[10:27] You don’t seem like the kind of guy who’d do well in doubles.

**[10:27] thats fair**

**[10:28] i only ever played doubles w my bro but never pro**

**[10:28] hed get us laughed off the court**

[10:29] Yeah, I was always a singles player, myself.

**[10:30] u played?**

[10:30] In middle school.

**[10:30] wow … the glory days of middle school**

[10:32] Shut up. It was just for fun. I do kind of miss it, though.

[10:32] I used to wonder if I’d have got far if I’d wanted to go pro.

[10:33] Our captain ended up going pro, actually. Then an injury made him retire one game into his career.

[10:34] Tezuka.

**[10:34] oh**

**[10:34] seigaku**

[10:35] Yeah. You know your tennis trivia.

**[10:35] my dad went there**

**[10:36] i was meant to go after elementary school but moms firm was doing well so we decided to stay in the us instead**

[10:36] Wow, that would have been weird.

[10:37] We could have met. Small world.

**[10:37] ya i really dodged a bullet**

[10:38] Hey now, I could have been your cool senpai.

**[10:39] momo-senpai**

[10:40] You remembered!

[10:41] Now I just need to know your name.

**[10:41] just call me echizen wtf**

[10:43] I refuse to play into your weird fantasy.

[10:43] I’m not into roleplay.

**[10:43] yeah right**

**[10:45] bet you want me to act like a blushing underclassman**

**[10:47] night momo-senpai**

\---             

 

[14:23] _Recipient received photo message._

**[14:24] ?**

[14:25] I thought it was kind of hypocritical to keep demanding proof about who you are when I don’t even have a face pic uploaded, so.

[14:24] Please don’t be too jealous of my spacious cubicle.

[14:25] I know prime real estate like this is enviable.

**[14:26] why the hell is ur hair so long**

**[14:27] why are you taking pics at work**

**[14:28] dont they have rules against that**

[14:29] What, are the office police gonna throw me in office jail?

[14:30] My manager gets pissed if its not tied back when I’m with clients, but otherwise they don’t care.

[14:45] So.

[14:46] It’s been like twenty minutes and so far I’ve had no feedback except “your hair is too long”, so that’s concerning.

**[14:49] i thought u wouldnt care what i thought**

[14:51] It’s not like I care about YOUR opinion in particular.

[14:52] But I might sort of have a date tonight and that kind of blow to my confidence is not appreciated.

[14:57] Anyway.

[15:05] Did you fall asleep, or…???

**[15:08] packing**

**[15:10] i have a flight tomorrow**

[15:19] You should have started earlier.

[15:36] You know, I’m not that desperate for a compliment.

[15:39] I’m just bored. Can you talk?

[15:50] Okay whatever.

\---

[10:03] Hey.

\---

[19:34] I know begging for validation wasn’t my finest moment, but I was nervous.

[19:42] So cut me some slack.

\---

[13:23] Uh????

\---

\---

\---

\---

\---

**[12:43] ur hot**

[12:59] Thanks. Asshole.

**[13:00] wat**

[13:01] It took that long to come up with that? It’s been like two weeks.

**[13:03] i got busy**

**[13:08] but u shouldnt have worried**

**[13:10] how did the date go**

[13:12] It was really weird.

[13:15] He always makes such a big deal out of the mundane shit.

[13:16] I said let’s get drinks and snacks, so he took me out in a helicopter and we drank champagne and he tried to make me eat foie gras.

**[13:19] u didnt eat it**

[13:23] I don’t eat anything I can’t pronounce, on principle.

[13:24] But after he told me what it was, I wouldn’t have been able to bring myself to.

[13:24] Those poor little chickens.

**[13:25] i think its geese**

[13:25] Same thing.

[13:29] Anyway, don’t date the CEO of your company. That’s what you have to take away from my experience.

**[13:32] thats scandalous momo-senpai**

[13:34] He just likes to rub shoulders with the common people.

[13:35] He says it “keeps him grounded”, like anyone with an ego like his could ever be.

**[13:37] i cant believe u have a sugar daddy**

[13:39] I DON’T.

**[13:41] do u want one**

**[13:43] i could treat u right**

[13:45] Asshole, your profile says you’re a year younger than me.

**[13:52] yeah but i can still take care of you**

**[13:53] ill win the davis cup for u**

**[13:54] im confirmed for the final now u know**

**[13:55] ill give u the trophy i have enough already**

[13:57] Sure you will.

[13:59] Is winning the tennis world’s most prestigious international event the reason you’ve been ignoring me?

**[14:03] kinda**

**[14:04] had to train a lot**

**[14:06] and go to australia**

**[14:07] but my coach said i can just chill for a while**

**[14:09] i went on a bunch of outback tours**

**[14:11] and i saw kaolos**

**[14:13] **koalas**

**[14:15] did u know kangaroos can jump up to three times their own height**

[14:15] I didn’t.

[14:17] Listen, this delusional fantasy of yours is all very interesting, but I gotta work.

**[14:20] wait**

**[14:20] before u go**

**[14:21] im stopping over in japan before i go back to the us**

**[14:23] wanna hang out**

[14:29] You can’t be serious.

**[14:30] ?**

[14:31] I don’t know what gave off the impression that I’m desperate enough to set up a date with an imaginary internet Echizen Ryouma roleplay account, but I’m not.

**[14:34] ok**

**\---**

‘Echizen’ didn’t reply now.

Momoshiro guessed he should count it as a blessing. He was easily distracted enough as it was, without having a stranger to annoy in the middle of the work day. Still, when Kaidoh wasn’t replying, it kind of sucked not to have anyone to message.

He wondered if the kid- he found it funny he thought of him as “the kid”, just because his profile _said_ he was 23, when in all likelihood the impostor was probably a married, middle-aged man- had taken time off messaging to “travel” again, or if he’d finally gotten sick of Momoshiro’s lack of gullibility. 

It wasn’t like he was the only person on that app. He was sure there were people who were naïve enough to think they’d met an actual real life tennis superstar, or didn’t even recognize him (somehow), or didn’t care and just found the attention flattering. It had been kind of entertaining, talking to him, but Momo didn’t miss it.

Not one bit.

At all.

Sitting at his desk, Momo tucked his cellphone back in his pocket as his manager stomped by, the top of his bald head visible over Momo’s cubicle.

“Do some _work_ , Momoshiro,” the man snapped, banging the flimsy wall. Momo didn’t know how he could always tell when he wasn’t working when he couldn’t even see him, but then again, statistically… “Or did the CEO make a mistake when he hired you personally?”

“What Atobe doesn’t know won’t hurt him,” Momo muttered. It had meant to be a joke, to lighten the mood, but it came out sounding surprisingly bitter. His manager glared at him.

“Oh, Momoshiro-kun,” a velvety voice cut in, and Momo, slumped over his desk, straightened immediately. Now Atobe had joined the top of his managers head on the other side of his cubicle wall, though Atobe was tall enough that he could peer into his tiny workspace with ease. “Nothing escapes my notice, here.”

Momoshiro thought about the his department’s running bet on whether or not Atobe would lose his hair by the time he was thirty, and wondered if the other knew about _that_. Probably not, or the office would be a lot quieter.

“Right,” Momo said, dryly, “Sorry, Atobe.”

His manager stomped away, fuming. He’d never liked how casually Momo talked to Atobe. The CEO slipped around the corner of Momo’s cubicle to step into it, leaning against the bare wall. There was barely enough room for them in it, Atobe standing and Momo sitting, and it felt a little claustrophobic.

“Do you have plans for after work?” Atobe asked. Momoshiro’s eyebrows raised, and he quickly added, “Don’t be obscene. I don’t mean it like _that_. Tezuka and I are meeting tonight for drinks. I thought you might like to see him.”

Ah. So that was how it was. For as infatuated as Atobe _clearly_ was with Tezuka, he didn’t seem to like going out with the other without some kind of buffer. Or maybe Tezuka, fully aware of Atobe’s feelings, just didn’t agree to one-on-one outings. Either way, Fuji was usually the third wheel in these uncomfortable non-dates, and Momo usually managed to avoid them. They were too awkward for words.

Momo decided he would politely decline.

“I…” he began, before stalling. The look Atobe was fixing him with right now was that of a superior who expected the correct answer from his employee. He quickly amended his answer. “I want to. But I can’t afford to go out right now.”

“Momoshiro, don’t be ridiculous,” Atobe drawled. “The company will cover it.”

That was Atobe speak for ‘it’s my treat’. 

\---

Momo was first there after work, even though he left the office half an hour early, in the hopes of minimizing the amount he had to spend at Atobe’s favourite bar.

Momo wasn’t used to going to bars where you could reserve tables, but he found the table with Atobe’s name written neatly on a placecard, and sat down. He also wasn’t used to bars with a view, but located on the fortieth floor of the same building he worked in, and with a floor-to-ceiling glass window making up two of the walls, the place offered an incredible, if not slightly nauseating, view of the city below.

The bar was primarily meant for entertaining important clients, so at 6PM on a Wednesday, it was quiet. Momo was thankful when he finally saw the door swing open and Tezuka entered.

He wasn’t sure when he last saw Tezuka. Maybe last year, at a birthday party Atobe had thrown for Kabaji and insisted he come to. The same mature, aloof aura Tezuka had had as a student seemed less strange on him now he was an adult. He was a lawyer now, his first year in practice, and he looked the part.

“Hey,” Momo said, as Tezuka took a seat next to him. “Are you wearing contacts?”

“Yes.” Tezuka’s hand moved, as though to push up his glasses, before he realized he wasn’t wearing them and moved to push his hair back, instead. “I thought I’d try them. I may switch back to glasses, though. I feel clients take me more seriously with them, somehow.”

Momo couldn’t suppress his laugh. It came out in an ungraceful snort.

“I don’t think anyone could take you any more seriously, captain,” he said, and Tezuka smiled, the brieest twitch of his lips.

“We’re not in school anymore, Momoshiro. It’s Tezuka, now,” he replied. “You look well. Are you enjoying your job?”

 “It’s fine,” Momo said. “I mean, it’s just dealing with people’s insurance. It’s boring.” He half expected Atobe to loom over him and catch him talking shit again. Then again, even if he had, Momo doubted Atobe would care while Tezuka was in the room. “It’s not as impressive as what you’re doing, cap- Tezuka.”

Tezuka made a neutral sound. His gaze shifted from Momo’s face to over his shoulder. Momo turned to see Atobe enter. He couldn’t help but notice that the CEO had changed from his expensive suit into an even fancier one.

Between Tezuka and Atobe, Momo felt _extremely_ underdressed. His suit was off the rack, a cheap graduation present from his younger brother, and he hadn’t even bothered to iron his shirt that morning.

Still, neither of them would care, least of all Atobe, who slid into the seat at the table next to Tezuka without even a glance in Momo’s direction.

“Tezuka.” 

Atobe practically purred the name. Tezuka replied with a stoic, “Atobe.”

“The fourth member of our party should be joining us shortly,” Atobe said, checking his watch. “For now, why don’t I get us some drinks? The usual, Tezuka?”

Tezuka nodded, and Momo, a little annoyed at not being asked, loudly announced, “And I’ll have a beer." 

“Of course,” Atobe answered, smoothly, before saying something in German that Momo couldn’t even really catch. “Is that okay?”

Momo shrugged. Atobe was always trying to culture him by buying him weird foreign beers. He missed when Kaidoh was around, and they could go to a dive bar and drink for the sake of getting drunk. Drinking with Atobe always felt like a game where the key to winning was ordering the most obscure alcohol.

He couldn’t complain about the beer Atobe brought, though. And watching the other fall over himself trying to impress Tezuka was almost funny, if not a little sad. Momo sat back into his plush seat (what kind of bar had ARMCHAIRS, really, this was just ridiculous), and he was beginning to zone out when the chair beside him was yanked out from under the table, and a sports bag dropped onto the floor between him and a newcomer.

“Ah, finally,” Atobe said, smiling.

The bright side was that with the addition of the newcomer, Momo was no longer the most underdressed. Momo looked practically dapper in comparison to the guy who joined them in tracksuit pants and a t-shirt. The other, not-so-bright side was that Momo was left gaping like an idiot.

“Hey,” Echizen said, looking to Atobe. Looking at Tezuka, he said, only marginally more politely, “Hello.”

Tezuka nodded in greeting, and Atobe looked to Momo. “I should introduce you, Momoshiro-kun. This is Echizen- but I’m sure you’ve heard of him. Our company has been sponsoring him for years.”

“Yo,” Momo said, unsure of what else to do.

Atobe clicked his tongue. “Momoshiro,” he said, like a disappointed mother, “Where are your _manners_?”

“Ah- right-“ Momo fumbled in his pocket, pulling out the business card case, and retrieving a card. He held it out to Echizen, finding it annoying he had to look up to meet the other’s eyes, even when they were both sitting. His best business voice assumed, Momo said, “Momoshiro Takeshi. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

Echizen took the card with one hand, glanced at it briefly, then dropped it onto the table. Atobe shot Momo a sharp look, and Momo was prompted to say, “Can I get you a drink, Echizen?”

“Ponta,” Echizen said.

Momo hesitated, unsure if it was a joke or not. Atobe, his tone a little jibing, said, “Bring him a soft drink, Momoshiro.”

Atobe should have brought Kabaji if he needed someone to be his errand boy so bad. Still, Momo did as he was told. Echizen barely even looked at him as he took the drink, taking a tentative sip. He seemed unsatisfied, with the cranberry flavouired sparkling water the bartender had poured, apparently amused by someone abstaining from alcohol.

If his choice of drink hadn’t gone down well, Atobe didn’t seem to care. He was smiling, laughing at a joke that _he_ had probably made, and said, “Isn’t this nice,” as Momo settled back into his seat.

“What is?” Momo asked, because neither Tezuka or Ryouma seemed willing to take the bait.

“Me here with Tezuka,” Atobe said, laying a hand on Tezuka’s shoulder and gesturing across the table, almost spilling the wine he held in his other hand. “You here with Echizen. Almost like a-” Tezuka shrugged Atobe’s hand off his shoulder, and Atobe corrected himself last second.

“Like a respectable get-together between platonic, professional friends,” he finished, looking deflated.

The failed attempt at a double date went progressively downhill from there. Echizen talked more to Tezuka than anyone else- Tezuka had studied in England for a year, and they chatted away in English while Atobe stewed. From time to time, he tried to cut in, to speak to Tezuka in German or his slightly-less-fluent English, but he always ended up talking to Momo instead.

Two conversations flowed at the same table. It was getting late when Atobe checked his watch and said, “Goodness, look at the time. It’s certainly getting late. Can I offer you a ride home, Tezuka? Kabaji will drive, of course.”

Tezuka hesitated, before he said, “That would be nice. Thank you, Atobe.”

Momo was hoping the offer would be extended to him. His rail pass had expired today and he couldn’t buy a new one until tomorrow morning. It’d be nice to save money on a train ticket. Instead, Atobe looked to Echizen and said, “And you rented a car, didn’t you, Echizen? Perhaps you could offer Momoshiro a ride home. His house is in the direction of your hotel.”

Echizen hesitated, his broad shoulders tensing. Momo laughed, shaking his head, “Atobe!” He said, “Don’t- Echizen doesn’t have to-”

“It’s fine,” Echizen said, cutting in. His Japanese sounded a little rough. Momo had noticed, over the course of the evening, that it was impolite in how informal it was, something he wasn’t sure was down to the fact that Echizen didn’t speak Japanese with strangers much, or because of his personality. “If I’m going that way anyway.”

He left Momo’s business card on the table as they left, which Momo felt a little resentful about. He paid for those business cards out of his own damn pocket. Outside, he clambered into Echizen’s rental, and buckled himself in.

“Why did you even hire a car?” He asked, looking to Echizen as he adjusted the mirror. “Traffic in Tokyo is annoying as hell.”

“Maybe you should have taken the train, then,” Echizen replied, dryly.

Momo didn’t answer. The contrast between this Echizen and the Echizen that messaged him is obvious. Not that he’d ever believed his weird e-pal, but seeing the real Echizen makes his claims even more unbelievable; Echizen in real life is cool, distant, and a little annoying with how haughty he comes across. Momo remembers the dorky profile with the dozens of cat photos and can’t help but laugh.

“What?” Echizen snapped, and Momo laughed more. Echizen glanced in the mirror, checking if there’s something on his face, and Momo managed to calm down, laughter fading to a half-hearted smile.

“Nothing,” he said, and gave Echizen directions to his place.

They drove in silence, the journey taking twice as long as it would on the train. When they pulled up outside his apartment building, Echizen fixed him with a strange look. Now it was Momo’s turn to feel self-conscious, and he mirrored Echizen’s “what?”

“Why did you stop talking to me?” Echizen said.

“In the bar?” Momo asked, brows knitting together. He wasn’t aware they’d even started talking. He couldn’t recall one conversation between them.

“No, dumbass,” Echizen grunted, his hands still gripping the steering wheel, eyes not meeting Momo’s. “Online.”

“What,” Momo said dumbly, because there is _absolutely no way_.

“Don’t play dumb,” Ryouma said. “I ask if you want to meet up and you get all weird. You could have just said no.”

Absolutely no fucking way. Momo couldn’t help but wonder if Atobe had found out about his chat history, and if this was all some bizarre prank orchestrated by him… but that was only a possibility in a world where Atobe had a sense of humour.

“You never messaged me, either,” Momo choked out, eventually.

“Exactly,” Echizen says, pointedly. “ _I_ never messaged _you_. You always started the conversation. I thought that was our thing.”

Echizen’s cheeks looked flushed, but Momo had to be seeing things in the dim light. His fingers drummed on the steering wheel. In profile, Echizen is incredibly handsome, even more good looking than he is in pictures. Momo wasn’t one to be easily flustered by good looking people, but thinking back, he said a lot of stupid shit to Echizen. He wasn’t often lost for words, but this is one of those times.

“How did you know I’d be here?” He finally managed to say, hoarsely.

“I didn’t, obviously,” Echizen answered. “I didn’t realize until I heard your name and then I remembered the hair and yeah, Atobe is definitely the kind of guy who’d take someone on a date and offer them champagne and goose liver pate.”

Momo nodded. Echizen added, “I can’t believe you went out with him.”

“It’s not like we were a couple!” Momo snapped.

Now his cheeks were hot. He hoped Echizen would mistake it for a trick of the light, but no such luck. The other raised a hand to brush Momo’s hair, now loose, out of his face, and he said, “You’re blushing, Momoshirou.”

His name sounded weird, said like that. When he didn’t reply, Echizen said, “Or should I call you Momo-chan?”

“Hell no,” Momoshirou said, drawing back. “Don’t get ahead of yourself, brat.”

Echizen smirked.

“I’m in Japan for one more week,” he said, “Let’s do something. And I don’t mean an Atobe date.”

“Sure,” Momo said. And then, because he was still struggling to believe this was happening, “I can’t believe you’re actually you. What the hell. You were- you seemed like such a _loser_.”

Echizen raised an eyebrow.

“Okay, okay, so I wasn’t exactly a catch either,” Momo said, hand flying to the door handle, prepared to fling the door open and barrel roll out the car depending on the answer to his next question. “Pick me up after work on Friday?”

“Sounds good,” Echizen said.

Barrel rolling wasn’t quite the extreme exit he needed anymore, but Momo stumbled as he got out of the car. He turned to see Echizen smirking at him, and brushed his suit down. He turned to see the window rolling down, and Echizen lifted a hand to wave goodbye.

“Let’s get burgers,” Momo said, “I like that better than-” he hesitated, “F-oy… fwah-“

“Foie gras,” Echizen said, smoothly, and Momo glared. “Burgers. Good. Can’t get enough of them in America.”

Momo, a little incensed, went to answer back, but the window was rolled up and Echizen was turning the car. Determined to have the last word, he reached into his pocket and grabbed his phone.

[22:34] You’re paying. You owe me for tonight.

[22:34] That drink was like 1500 yen and you didn’t even finish it.


End file.
